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Archive for the ‘Culture’ Category

Old Man Gamer: Xbox Game Pass Edition

Posted in Gaming, tagged , , , , , on 01 Nov 2025| 2 Comments »

Xbox is at a crossroads, and one major speed bump in their path seems to involve their Game Pass subscription service. Two major price increases over the past few years have caused many to reevaluate our priorities. Myself included.

To refresh memories: I’m a sixty-something Boomer who plays video games. I’ve been a consistent Xbox player, and partook in regular multiplayer sessions with my Saturday Night Massacre Posse for about twenty years … until my retirement last year. I do have a PS4 console, because … Horizon Zero Dawn … but Sony was never been my gaming “home.” Rather, I was a long-time Xbox Gold membership holder and, when it became cost-effective, a Game Pass and then Game Pass Ultimate subscriber.

Even when the SNM Posse was active (so named, because that was when my day-shift gaming window overlapped with my fellows’ graveyard shift availability), we generally played only a few games on the regular. Rainbow Six, Gears of War, Borderlands, Destiny, Ghost Recon, Halo, Sniper Elite—primarily FPS or TPS style titles—these were our Go-To games, played predominantly in co-op mode (we weren’t an overly competitive posse). Sure, we’d feather in the occasional platformer or isometric or soulslike title, but they came and, after a few months, they went. And we played hard. We’d start after dinner and would go late/early, often until 0300 hrs. It was a stretch for me, but worth it, as the banter alone (plus the challenge of keeping up with my much younger fellows) was great fun.

Post-retirement, though, the SNM Posse just dissolved. Since I’m not one for playing with strangers—I can’t keep up with twenty-something’s twitch-muscle reaction times, and won’t put up with the crude and too-often offensive language that passes as “repartee”—this meant that my need for a multiplayer service had come to an end. Yet, Game Pass Ultimate offered so many games, including some “Day One” titles I knew I’d enjoy (Borderlands 4 and Outer Worlds 2, to name a couple of recent additions), so I continued with my subscription.

Then, this fall, Microsoft jacked up the Game Pass Ultimate subscription rate by 50%, from $20/month to $30/month, or $360/year (what? you want a discount for paying for a whole year in advance? who do you think we are? HBO? LOL!).

As outlined above, I do not burn through video game titles. I don’t play a game for a few hundred hours in a single month and then move on to the next shiny new title. I don’t consume eight, twelve, twenty titles in a given year. Even if I include the small indie titles I play, I might go through six games in a calendar year. Is that worth $360/year? Even with the now-standard $70 price for a Day One AAA game, is it worth it?

Nope. It ain’t. And I suspect a lot of gamers are working this math the same way I have.

I will probably play three, at most four AAA titles in a year, and if I wait a bit, I’ll pay a discounted portion of that $70 list price. I can pick up a handful of indie games at anywhere from $5 to $15, if they get good reviews and the gameplay matches my likes. I still have my Xbox account, should multiplayer opportunities arise, but I’m not depending on it. There are so many older RPG/FPS/TPS titles out there, games I’ve never even tried, there’s no reason to pay such an exorbitant subscription price (especially if I have to save up for a new console!).

Video games used to be a unifying activity. It was something that bridged the age gap between myself and the younger folks I knew. With people struggling to make rent and buy groceries, and with the costs of gaming increasing by 20, 50, 60%, it’s losing its broad-based demographic in favor of a more affluent customer base.

Sometimes I wonder if Microsoft really gets gaming.

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To Persist, Resist

Posted in Poetry, Politics, tagged , , , , , , on 23 Oct 2025| Leave a Comment »

don’t give in to the maelstrom’s song
the downward spiral toward denial
of what your bones know is righteous or wrong

don’t let the harmonies that sing in your blood
go quiet and numb, muffled and choked
by the unfeeling actions of criminal hearts

there’s so much so much this onrushing tide
of gleeful cruelty and polished-brass venality that
to think of nothing to jettison hope can seem the softer path

but love dies when hearts go silent
and despair takes root when tears dry up
numbness saves no one not others not us

so let the feelings come seek them out
lean in and swim with the building wave
shout out rise up and take the beachhead

for this is a fight we dare not lose

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What I Want to Hear

Posted in Culture, Politics, tagged , , , , , , , on 05 Oct 2025| 2 Comments »

Republicans are blaming the Democrats for the shutdown and, following the standard congressional “I’m rubber, you’re glue” playbook, Democrats are blaming the GOP in turn. That’s a weak, schoolyard response, and I’m sick of that game. Here’s what I want to hear from Democrats:

“You’re goddamn right we’re responsible. We are shutting this shit-show down, using every tool we can muster, using the power of the minority (just as you have done so many times over the years) to obstruct, to delay, to thwart, to frustrate, to discomfit, to drive a wedge between y’all and your base, to amplify our voice and blast our message, and our message is this: We will not be complicit!

“We will not be complicit in making health care unaffordable for millions by raising premiums and cutting services (and don’t trot out that bullshit lie about us wanting to provide health care to undocumented immigrants, because you know folks need an SSN to apply for Obamacare, and the undocumented, by definition, don’t have one).  People are having a very tough time, right now, and we won’t help you make it worse. We won’t. You’ll have to sit down with us. You’ll have to take the damned meeting. You’ll have to negotiate. You’ll have to fucking govern instead of strutting around like a bunch of mooks in cheap suits running a protection racket.

“Moreover, we will not be complicit in supporting your destruction of our society. We won’t support this rogue militia you’ve created out of ICE and CBP, a force that rappels from BlackHawks down into American cities to round up people indiscriminately, en masse, without warrants, destroying property, terrorizing communities, citizens and immigrants, adults and children alike. No. We won’t.

“We’re not going to just stand by and wring our hands and think back fondly on gentler times while you erode our most basic rights. No, JD, we’re not going to be ‘civil’ in the face of your incivility, we’re not going to be silent and meek when one of the tenets of our founding documents enshrines our freedom to tell you that you’re wrong and we’re right and why.

“And we’re not going to just bite our tongues when you call everything an ‘emergency’ so you can raise the cost of goods with tariffs, withhold funding appropriated by law, extort businesses and universities into silence, prosecute individuals because they made you look bad, and slap the ‘terrorist’ label on anyone exercising free speech.

“No. We’re not. We’re going to shut this down, and we’re going to do it loudly and unapologetically. We’re going to make governing this nation as difficult as possible until you come to the table, sit down, and negotiate. We are doing this because of the real and lasting harm you are perpetrating against our nation. We are doing this because we fucking can, and because the American people need someone to protect them, to look out for their needs, their health, and their lives.”

That is what I want to hear. That is what I think we need to hear.

k

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Dear Senator

Posted in Culture, Politics, tagged , , , , , , , , , on 27 Sep 2025| Leave a Comment »

I write to express my strong support for your recent vote to REJECT the continuing resolution to fund the government, and I beg you to hold fast and continue to fight for a negotiated bill that will undo some of the worst effects of the GOP’s efforts to strip American’s in need of their Medicaid and ACA assistance.

Moreover, I am also in support of the broader position that we cannot continue to fund the GOP’s efforts to dismantle the federal government, nor the administration’s obvious predisposition to limit, ignore, and outright deny American citizens their constitutionally-protected rights. A vote for the CR would make us all complicit in our own demise, and would be nothing less than appeasement of this the president’s growing autocracy.

I know that the president has threatened mass firings/layoffs should a shutdown come to pass, but I have two things to say about that.

First, he threatened this the last time, and Democrats blinked, wanting to avoid the unnecessary hardship that firings would cause to thousands of government employees. However, that concession, that concern, got Democrats nothing but a black eye and a reputation for not having the resolve to match their rhetoric.

Second, firing those employees would be the president’s choice, not a necessity, as he has the option of furloughing them instead. If he does fire thousands, yes, it will cause those employees harm, but how much harm will be caused by the loss of Medicaid and ACA subsidies? We must weigh the difference between employees losing their jobs and citizens losing their lives.

So it is with knowledge of the painful ramifications a shutdown would cause that I plead with you to stand your ground for as long as it takes to bring your GOP colleagues to the table, to push the president to take your meetings, and to force this administration to govern by negotiation and consensus, rather than by fiat.

Thank you for your past service to our state and to the nation.

In hope,

k

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No, I am not Glad

Posted in Politics, tagged , on 18 Sep 2025| Leave a Comment »

With my reputation as a life-long and somewhat outspoken liberal, some can be excused for assuming that I was glad to hear that Mr. Kirk was assassinated. This is not so. I am most definitely not glad of it.

Primarily, having lost a parent in my youth, I empathize with the loss his wife and children are suffering. Though his children are younger than I was—I was almost six when my mother died—such a loss effects the entire family, and for a long time. I still feel the effects of my mother’s death, a lifetime later, and given Kirk’s large-sized life and the manner of his death, I know his family will feel it forever. Nothing to be glad of, there.

Also, I lived through a period marked by political assassinations. From JFK and MLK and RFK to Milk and Moscone and Sadat, I’ve experienced the gut-wrench of seeing a hero struck down, the rage of having one man’s bullet steal the hope of multitudes, and the despair as that rage boiled up, spilled over, and engendered an escalation that led to more violence, more hatred, more division.

And then there’s the fact that political assassinations never bring about the result desired. Assassins see their act as the simple solution to a complex problem, but all their crimes do is create new sets of problems and embolden their victim’s supporters, exacerbating tensions and giving new life to old hatreds. We see this happening now, too, and I am not glad of it.

I was not a fan of Kirk’s outlook and philosophy, and found much of it backward-looking and hate-filled. However, I’ve learned that there are many in my circle who, before this week, had never even heard of Charlie Kirk. It’s reasonable to assume, therefore, that there are many right-leaning folks who were likewise ignorant of Kirk’s message and activism. Until now. Thus, rather than silencing Kirk’s message, this assassination has the unintended effect of amplifying his message, presenting it to more people who might find it acceptable. It transforms messenger into martyr, and I don’t see this as a positive.

Amid all this, there’s the ridiculous tendency for pundits and politicians and performers to keep score. An assassin’s motives are, to my mind, largely irrelevant, because the crime is indefensible. So, regardless of whether Kirk’s assassin was an alt-right reactionary or an ultra-left-wing anarchist, the end results are the same. Understanding motives is only relevant when discussing radicalization in the aggregate; when we talk about individuals, it only serves to rile and enrage and justify finger-pointing tirades.

Finally, there’s the permission structure the assassin has provided Kirk’s supporters. By murdering a man who was—let’s face it—simply exercising his rights to freedom of speech, Kirk’s assassin has given our nascent autocracy the perfect excuse to ratchet up their own rhetoric, prosecute political enemies, label criticism as “hate speech” (which is protected by the First Amendment and legal precedent*, by the way), attack/doxx/fire private citizens for expressing opinions, and manipulate corporations, markets, and media that don’t hew to the prescribed orthodoxy.

None of this—none of it—makes me glad. None of it is good. None of it is helpful. None of it solves anything.

So . . . what to do?

The only thing that has helped me avoid absolute despair this week is this: be kind. Especially—and this is the hard part—be kind to those you encounter who may be grieving over the death of someone they admired. Why? Because a lot of people who admired Kirk are unaware of his more incendiary and regressive views, having only been exposed to his more faith-based and patriotic messaging. Also, there are those who, as mentioned, were unaware of Kirk in general, but who see the assassination of a right-wing firebrand as an attack on their world view. Being kind to these folks, right now, might allow you to have a reasoned discussion where everyone is able to agree that Kirk’s assassination is not something that makes us glad, even though we disagreed with him. Naturally, there are those who are wholly on-board with what Kirk was laying out there, but even then, being kind is useful, as it protects us from entering into useless arguments.

That’s my take on things. I will never be glad that someone is assassinated.

*Info on the SCOTUS precedent (for what it’s worth these days) can be read about via this link to Matal v. Tam

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Why We Can’t Have Anything Nice

Posted in Creativity, Hi Tech, Politics, Writing, tagged , , , , , , , , , , , on 28 Aug 2025| Leave a Comment »

AI; the grift that keeps on grifting. Feed it, press a button, and (in the immortal words of our president) “Bing Bong Bing,” there you have it: AI slop.

It’s everywhere, now including your bookshelf. If you’re not careful, that is.

And we weren’t.

We wanted to read Robert Reich’s new memoir, Coming Up Short, so we went to the Evil Empire (aka Amazon) and searched. “What format?” was the question. Hardcover, Paperback, Kindle, or Audio? Paperbacks are easier on our ancient hands, so that’s what we picked. And there was our first error. I did not see the red flag, did not twig that this was a new release, available in both Hardcover and Paperback? That never happens. If you get a hardback deal, publishers aren’t going to undercut that with a simultaneous paperback release. Sadly, all we saw was the reduction from the hardcover price (expected in a paperback), so we dropped that turd into our cart and hit the checkout.

My bad on that score.

When the book arrived, it was (as my wife described it) like opening a door to an alternate universe. I was coming up the stairs as she first viewed our purchase, and all I heard her say was, “….the hell?” The cover (pictured, right) was unlike anything we’d ever seen on a new release from a major publisher. It was also about half the thickness of a major release (150 pp vs the 400 pp of the hardback).

….the hell? Indeed.

What we had purchased was a bunch of AI slop.

Someone—definitely not Shem Grant, the named author of this tripe, whose magnum opus has now been de-listed from Amazon—fed a bunch of open source info into an AI chatbot, had it spit out enough slop to fill the 150 pages required to give it a spine, slapped a cartoonish rendition of its subject on the cover, and voila, instant grift. I’ll admit, I’ve not read this “product,” but in skimming through I found it repetitive, composed much like a high schooler’s book report, and rife with errors (within three minutes I fact-checked two: Reich was born in Scranton, not New York, and he was a Rhodes Scholar, not a Marshall Scholar).

Yup . . . AI slop.

Is this a thing? I wondered. Heading back out to Amazon, I executed similar searches for new memoirs and found similar AI-generated knock-off versions:

  • Jacinda Ardern’s A Different Kind of Power had half a dozen slop versions
  • Liz Cheney’s Oath and Honor had a few grift versions, plus about a dozen “workbook” editions
  • Kamala Harris’ 107 Days had fifteen (!) “books” that included the phrase “107 days” in their title, all by “authors” who had no other titles to their credit

In addition to these obvious attempts to con buyers by piggybacking similarly titled slop onto the sales of new releases, there were many self-styled “biographies” that had dubious authors, were listed as “independently published,” and often had obviously AI-generated covers (some that were really bad, and I mean like embarrassingly bad).

So, this stuff is out there, and there is a lot of it.

Remember when self-publishing became a thing? Remember how everyone wrung their hands over that? “There’s already enough crap out there in the book-sphere, and now everyone who can hold a pencil is going to think that they’re a writer!”

Hehe. Good times, eh? Because now, not only can anyone with enough grip strength to hold a pencil pose as a writer, but all those who are too lazy to even pick up a damned pencil are able to churn out utter rubbish, slap a fake name and an SEO-optimized title on it, send it into the Amazonian jungle to sting the unwary, reap the grift, and move on.

It’s enough to make one want to give up.

But, lesson learned. Once burned . . . .

k

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Dream Jobs

Posted in Creativity, Culture, Music, tagged , , , , , , , on 31 Jul 2025| Leave a Comment »

We all are aware of folks who are fortunate to make a living at their dream job. Usually, this is a confluence of talent and hard work and luck; we “mortals” see them as world-class athletes, renowned experts, and global celebrities. But I know that there are folks out there living quiet lives, who are also working at their dream job, as a teacher, a firefighter, a decorator, a data analyst, and such. Not all dream jobs are splashy. And, the concept of “dream job” isn’t fixed, isn’t static; they change over time, as we grow and learn and become ourselves.

When I was in grammar school, my dream job—as it was for many—was to be a veterinarian. What could possibly be better than working with puppies and dogs and kittens and cats all day? So, when given the opportunity to spend the day at a vet clinic, I leapt at the chance (as did several of my schoolmates). The day started with grooming and nail clipping and such, but when we were introduced to the procedure called “expression of the anal glands,” I was out. Looking back, I’m pretty sure they popped that particular procedure into the day’s agenda so as to weed out the weak of spirit. Wise move.

Shortly thereafter, I was given a violin to play, and all thoughts of a “dream job” were set aside in favor of figuring out how, as a bookish, bespectacled violinist, I might survive into puberty. Somehow, through strategic applications of humor and social invisibility, I survived the wholly predictable bullying and made it into adolescence. At this point my success with the violin and my now well-honed acumen in pleasing those in positions of authority led to other musical opportunities. Violinists were a dime a dozen in grade school, but a viola player? Priceless. So, sure, I could try that. And I did. How about branching out? The jazz ensemble needs a bass player. Wanna? I’m on it. Band could use a tuba player. Any interest? You bet. I also tried bassoon and French horn, but sadly I met my match with piano and harp (playing two staves of music at once was, simply, sadly, beyond my ability).

But all of this was an academic exercise. None of it hit me as a “calling,” and none of it constituted a dream job. Could I see myself as a musician? Sure. It made my folks proud, it brought a certain frisson of fame during recitals and concerts, and it put me into the society of kindred souls, some brilliant, some pedestrian, but all of us akin to misfit toys searching for a home.

Then my high school orchestra teacher, the wonderfully eccentric Hugo Rinaldi (may his memory be a blessing) decided to start a “student conductor” program. Would I be interested? Oh hell yes!

Instant Dream Job.

Everything changed for me at that point. I had my first Life Goal: Symphony Conductor.

It was a great opportunity to learn, but it was also a thrill to stand up there, baton in hand, and lead an orchestra through a performance of stirring music. During those few years, I conducted musicians through symphonies and concerti and musicals and operas. I conducted orchestras, symphonic bands, marching bands, chamber groups, and pit orchestras. I loved it! It was a tremendous, not because I was the focal point on stage—that was actually the aspect I cared for the least—but because it was a collective experience, where through rehearsals and sectionals and repetition we all, together, brought a piece of music to life, and if I had done my job well, by the time we performed, I was merely a timekeeper, a reminder, an encourager, an adjuster of volume and balance and speed and precision.

And so, entering university, my dream of a life as a conductor was my goal.

Within two years, that dream was dead.

The conductor “path” at my uni had certain requirements. Beyond the music history, theory, and orchestration that were part of any performance major, it also had a specific requirement for proficiency on the piano. No way around it. In time, this requirement made perfect sense—most conductor path grads would go on to get teaching credentials, and when leading a school orchestra, being able to play the score on piano was an almost essential tool—but at the time, the revelation was devastating. The joy I experienced leading an orchestra from sight-reading to performance, that exaltation I felt as the conduit of an orchestra’s creative energy, it would never be, not for me.

I kept on with music for many years afterward, but it was not a dream job. I tried doing an end-run around the hurdles. When I was principal violist for a regional symphony, I tried to cajole the conductor into allowing me to lead the group so he could go out and check the balance (we really needed it in our concert hall), but ceding the podium, even for a few minutes, was something that particular conductor would never contemplate.

And so, eventually, the dream was not only dead but finally buried.

In time, I found other avenues of interest, and contemplated other “dream jobs.” As I grew older, more introverted, and (admittedly) more jaded about dealing with the public, my concept of a dream job became more solitary and cloistered.

“Successful novelist” was one dream job. I gave that two decade’s hard work before reality sunk in; the best I was able to achieve was “accomplished novelist.” A more recent iteration was “museum conservator,” specifically of documents and books, but by the time I began contemplating that, I knew it would remain more “dream” than “job.”

Now that I’ve retired, I have no need of a job of any kind, “dream” or otherwise. Now I am free to do what I will (as long as my health holds out, I guess).

In the end, though, I have to say that I’m not rueful over dream jobs never achieved, for I have dreams that I have achieved. A happy home, a secure life for my family, an excellent partner, a long marriage. And as for those dreams that lay broken along my life’s margins, they are what led me to achieve things nearly dreamed of, gave me a taste of perfection, and drove me to efforts I did not believe I could perform.

So I say: Regret no failure met in service of a worthy goal.

Onward

k

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