Kurt R.A. Giambastiani

If you say the word “gullible” very slowly, it sounds like “oranges.”

Did you try? Did you even think about trying? Then I’ve got a guy who wants to meet you.

I heard about this guy over at Ms. Vivienne’s Process of Elimination blog, and I thought she was making it up.

She wasn’t.

His name is Braco. One name. Just “Braco.”

[Make sure you pronounce it correctly. Just as Sade throws in that lateral lisp and an “r”, this one-name wonder has a Slavic twist to his moniker. It’s pronounced “BRA-tzoh”…like matzoh with a bra.]

Anyway, Braco is a gazer.

Yup. He gazes. That’s his job. That’s his profession. That’s his calling.

And (for a nominal fee), Braco will gaze…at you.

Sorry. I just got all shivery there for a minute.

Braco has reportedly made tumors disappear, brought hearing to the deaf, given breath to the asthmatic, all through the intense healing power of his gaze. Braco is also careful to sail on the windy side of the law, and does not claim to have healing powers. He’s also careful to make sure you know his gazing is so intense that pregnant women aren’t allowed in his presence past their first trimester. Yes, his gaze is that intense. (smh)

So, what is this “gazing” of which he speaks?

Step right up! Hand over $8, and you can enter the big top where you and a couple hundred others will experience this for yourselves. After a 10-minute introduction, Braco will stand there and, for 5-10 minutes, stare at you. After the “gazing,” there is a 10-minute…what…cool-down? Whatever.

Then you’re ushered out (unless you’ve paid for the all-day sucker pass) and the next flock of sheep is led in to be sheared. In and out, every half hour, nine sessions each day.

Now, at $8 a head, you might be saying, “Hey, lighten up! What’s the harm?”

The harm? None really. At $8 a session, $72 for the whole day, it’s not a lot of money. So no real harm, other than the fact that it’s all utter bushwah and he belongs in a class with snake oil salesmen and revival tent faith healers.

I mean come on people. Gazing? Seriously? How do people just disconnect their brains like that?

Braco (born in Croatia as Josip Grbavac) earned a degree in Economics. And an economist won’t have a problem multiplying that $8 fee by the reputed hundreds of thousands of people Braco gazes at during a given year.

It’s plain to see what called him to this profession.

k