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Be It Hereby Resolved

Gossamer WheelYesterday, New Year’s Day, was Global Hangover Day.

It was also Global Magical Thinking Day.

Call me a cynic, but there is nothing special about New Year’s Day. It has no potency, no power. It signifies nothing of interest in the physical world, marks neither solstice or equinox, time to sow or time to reap. Continue Reading »

It’s a Rule

Salal RainIt’s Blogging 101: Thou shalt recap the year.

Continue Reading »

An Inconvenient Idea

Stack of Books

It is an unfortunate truth that inspiration usually strikes when you are least able to act upon it. The perfect solution to your living room furniture arrangement comes when you are away on holiday. The critical piece of a work problem comes when you are in the shower.

Today, I got an idea for a new story fifteen minutes before I had to be at work.

I’d just spent the holiday week relaxing, watching movies, streaming a new (to us) series, cooking a big meal of crab cioppino for friends, and puttering in the garage. During that time, my writer’s mind was a blank (aside from pangs of guilt over not working on my novel).

All week, nothing, and then this morning, just as I was preparing to get up and get back to the work-a-day monkey-boy grunt-job, bam.

I hate that.

Excuse me while I scribble down some notes…

k

Conflicted in Seattle

When it comes to snow, Seattle is conflicted.

We love it. We hate it.

And tomorrow, we’re gonna get it, or so says Cliff Mass, a scholar of weather in the Pacific Northwest.

Snow in Seattle is rare and unpredictable. It’s also a huge pain in the ass, precisely because it is so rare and unpredictable. We don’t have “snow storms” in Seattle; we have “snow events.” Incoming storms are always rain storms that freeze up on arrival. Conditions have to be just so before the white stuff falls, and tomorrow, it looks like a sure thing.

When snow does fall, Seattle takes on a different character. People look up more. Spirits lift. I see more smiles on the faces I pass on the street. Old buildings look newer and new buildings look older, as if the entire city has shifted to some mid-20th century convergence point. New sounds fill the streets–crunching footsteps, creaking tires–while other sounds are muffled.

Snow in Seattle is an excuse. Schools open late or close down for the duration. People “work from home” or head home early “to beat the traffic.” Metro buses chain up, giving us the modern equivalent to sleigh bells as they jangle along their routes. News teams put on their yellow weather jackets and stand on street corners to report, or drive around in cars with dash-cams to show us that yes, indeed, snow is falling in Seattle.

We love it!

Until we don’t.

Snow in Seattle is not all Currier and Ives. We have hills–big hills–and it doesn’t take much snow to make some of them impassable. One favorite spot for news crews is at the foot of Queen Anne Hill looking up the counterbalance, where the snow creates a game of bumper cars on an inclined plane for any driver so foolish as to venture on the slick hillside. Our snowplows, such as they are, only hit the arterials, leaving side streets covered in snow and ice. In serious events, freeway shoulders are littered with vehicles wounded or abandoned. 

By and large, the only Seattleites who drive in the snow are those who don’t know how. Those who do know how to drive in the snow know that the real danger is not the snow. It’s the idiots in 4WD SUVs who are going too fast (because they have 4WD), and so we stay off the roads and let the idiots Darwin it out on the unplowed streets.

Luckily, snow in Seattle is usually short-lived. Whatever falls overnight has melted off the roadways by noon and is gone by the next morning. Sure, it might screw up a commute or two, might mess with your schedule as you deal with the kids for an extra 2 hours before their school’s late start, but overall, it’s nice, polite, and beautiful while it lasts.

Tomorrow will be one of those days (or so says Cliff).

I’m lucky. I work from home on Fridays, and tomorrow I’m logging off early to start a super-long holiday weekend. If the snow lasts a bit, I’ll be able to go out for a drive in the white-clad neighborhoods. Perhaps I’ll stop, get out, take a few crunching steps in the pristine snow, smile at a stranger and wish them happy holidays.

Maybe it’ll be you.

I wish you all a pleasant holiday week, and a safe and happy new year.

k

The last one is gone.

Yesterday, the last of my Deities of Cinema, Peter O’Toole, passed away at the age of 81.

Born on an unknown date in an unknown location, he was the son of a Scottish nurse and an Irish bookie who made their way through the underclass of war-torn Britain. O’Toole came from little, but followed his nose and his talent, and eventually built a larger-than-life-sized persona to match his larger-than-life-sized career. He was a colossus in a profession filled with stars and showed himself able to handle anything from farcical comedy to tragic drama to subtle, supporting roles. He could be urbane, crude, boisterous, bombastic, kind, loving, cruel, imperious, or callow as the role required, and he gave us iconic performances as Lawrence, Lord Jim, a young Henry II (Becket), an elder Henry II (The Lion in Winter), Mr. Chips, Don Quixote, Alan Swann, and dozens of others.

There are other great actors alive in the world today; this cannot be denied. But there are no more giants. The industry has changed, and it can no longer contain the type of personality O’Toole presented to us.

Working with O’Toole during the filming of King Ralph, John Goodman, asked the revered actor if he might borrow an ashtray.

O’Toole flicked his cigar ash on the floor.

“Make the world your ashtray, my boy.”

The last one is gone.

k

Hit & Miss

The British television industry has a tradition of creating short-lived series. In America, a show may have 23 episodes in a season; in Britain, it is often only half that or, as fans of the recent Sherlock reboot well know, only three. In addition, the Brits will create a “series” that is only expected to live one, maybe two years. Where we Yanks will keep a show going well past its sell-by date, the Brits make a show, air it, and move on to the next idea, the next story.

Naturally, they have their long-standing staples like Coronation Street, East Enders, Top Gear, and Time Team (which sadly was canceled after two decades of wonderful programming), but by and large this “one-off” approach to television creates a more varied viewing landscape where, if you don’t like a show, just wait a month or two and something new will be on.

And so, British television will often take risks that would give American television execs apoplexy.

Hit & Miss is a perfect example. Continue Reading »

Blowing a Gasket

It’s hard not to anthropomorphize.

My lawnmower is cranky and only likes to start if I tip it on its nose when I prime the engine. I have often described my computers as malevolent or downright evil. I’ve named every car I’ve ever owned, and have been known to plead, cajole, and beg, as if my entreaties will urge the vehicle on that one last mile to the gas station.

It’s all nonsense, of course. My conversations with inanimate objects do nothing except perhaps answer an inner echo from our pre-industrial heritage, when horses, donkeys, and oxen were our “engines,” and talking to them did make a difference.

Still, it’s hard not to anthropomorphize. Continue Reading »