When I went to sleep, I was thinking about the story I’m working on.
When I woke up, I was thinking about the story I’m working on.
This is exactly what I hoped would happen, when I decided to put off working on my new novel and pick up a short story instead. The novel was too big a project, what with all the other drama in our lives. The short story was more manageable, more…realistic…given my current state of mind.
So, what have I done on this old story?
First, I discovered that I still really like the story. That’s definitely a good thing. It would have been a challenge to rewrite a story I didn’t like, making it into one I did like, but this is challenge enough for now.
Second, I deconstructed it in a way I couldn’t have, twenty years ago.
- I put each scene on a timeline; i.e., this scene is T-minus-50 years, this scene is T-plus 2 days, etc. This allows me to determine how the story looks if told in strict chronological order, which is how the characters see it. In doing this, I found errors in thought, errors in character, errors in continuity.
- I distilled each scene down to its elements. What characters, what action, what conflict is in each scene? Through this exercise, I saw which scenes were unnecessary. If it doesn’t directly relate to the conflict, it’s irrelevant.
- I analyzed each main character as they exist in the story, seeing the story through their eyes. Comparing this result with the text, I was able to see where I’d gone wrong, where my characters acted out of character. When I was thirty-five, my idea of how a 75-year old man would think and act was
totally ignorantsomewhat different from how I see it now. Today, I bring an additional twenty years of observation and interaction to the table. Today, I don’t have to imagine what a 30-year marriage feels like. And today, I’ve seen significant loss close up, with adult eyes. All this helps me craft a better cast of characters.
And finally, I’ve begun the rewrite, and I definitely do mean rewrite. I am not merely going through the old text and making changes here and there. I’m writing the whole story out again, from scratch. The old story is merely my guideline; it’s stage directions for my pen to follow as it speaks the lines. My character enters the room, discusses thus-and-such, hits his mark at the window. My pen writes the details, crafts the words.
As a bonus, I’m learning.
I’ve often said that a writer can learn just as much from a bad book as from a good book. Well, the original version of this story wasn’t bad (it did get published, after all, got me a good-sized check and everything), but it wasn’t good, not by my current standards. It was the best I could do then, but I can do better, now.
There was a lot of “telling” in the original. The sentence “Jackson snorted in disgust,” is now simply, “Jackson snorted.” His words and actions must convey his disgust, not my narrative. There was also a lot of passive voice, and a lot of past pluperfect tense, as I stack flashback on flashback. The structure is still there, but boy howdy, did all that pluperfect get tossed. Yeesh.
I’m also stretching my muscles in character creation. In my writing now, the characters are the most important aspect; if they’re not believable, the battle is lost. Working in a short story allows me to focus on the characters. What’s he feeling? Why did she do that? Again, I’m finding lots of inconsistencies in the original; there are elements of characterization that look tossed in, without consideration or follow-through.
This is all good stuff. More to the point, it’s effective in just the way I wanted it to be: it’s getting me back in the game, keeping my writer-mind active, giving my writer-ego a boost.
Onward.
k
Loving your approach to the re-write. Also loving the additional confidence that’s clearly come with the years; being able to say that a story was good but not as good as you can make it now is a laudable statement of growth.
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Thank you. I’m about halfway through the–rewrite really isn’t the proper word…re-creation?–and I’m enjoying it on several levels. In one way, it’s a great confidence booster as the old version was rife with “telling” and “thought words.” I also had taken out scenes that were important to character development and, since this is really a character-driven piece, they should be there.
I’m not doing a lot of restructuring; very little, in fact. But I’m finding that the prose that comes out of my pen now is a lot less…florid. My writing style has become more spare in recent years. I have learned that I don’t have to prettify the language to sell the scene. If the characters are strong, if the action is believable, if the conflict is something with which the reader can identify, it doesn’t need fancy.
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Your methodical approach to your writing as work is inspiring to me. Thanks for this.
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Happy to help, Michael.
One of my weaknesses is that I get stalled in analysis, in the _thinking_. Fear of failure keeps me from the actual _doing_, but knowing this, I know when I need to be watchful and a little harder on myself than normal.
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